It all sounded so easy...

Here we sit, yet another 'relationship' down the gurgler. Sadly getting somewhat past the 'use by' date - well, at least according to the media anyway. Being over about 25 qualifies you for that particular category.  And I guess the few grey hairs and odd saggy bit creeping in do tend to indicate father time has a rather cruel sense of humour.  Hours spent on the net instead of at the gym also tend to give one a square bottom and a rather pasty, gollum-like hue.

So, where do the desperate and dateless go to find someone new? All the friends are either as bitter and lonely as we are and could well be considered  competition for what few crumbs of the opposite sex that might wander in our general direction.   Or they are happily snuggled up next to 'Mr or Ms Right' and living in sickeningly sweet 'couples' bliss.  We are well past the pub and night club scene - hell, anything beyond 10pm is just getting ridiculous - the kids will be up by 6:30am, there's work tomorrow, and that meeting til 7pm, not to mention Kid A has soccer practise, Kid B is going to ballet, and Kid C had got the flu, the washing machine is on the fritz so the fix it guy needs phoning, Kid C shoved Barbie down the loo...  need I go on?  

But during one of those long, lonely evenings, once the kids are in bed and there is nothing worth watching on TV, one discovers with a sense of euphoria and eternal optomism.... the joys of online dating. It's all so easy! Type in a few words about yourself, you know how it goes... enjoys walks on the beach, reading, snuggled up on the couch with a dvd etc etc - a quick rummage for the old digital camera (having first applied a thick layer of makeup and trying to get the hair to look like Jennifer Anistons) and a few carefully angled snaps to hide the second chin and the fact you haven't gotten around to waxing the old 'moustache' lately, and you're away.  

Any minute now, you naiively dream, the offers will come pouring in. Educated, intelligent, handsome (or beautiful if you are looking for a woman) wealthy people are out there just waiting for you to upload your profile.  You are just what they have been looking for! They will look like a movie star, make love like a porn star, show your ex how over him/her you are, and whisk you off to places exotic and afar.  Right? 

Hmmmmm - so now for the reality check...   Having had a wee taste of the online dating scene, I look back with great amusement at my own innocence and am quite sure there are many more stories to tell than mine.  So, for those of you who have 'been there and done that' like me, or are about to embark on your own internet dating journey, here are a few good, bad and ugly stories I would like to share.  Done in absoloute annonymity - this is about having a bit of fun but also a realistic look at what online dating can be like - but is not intended to offend or hurt any of the other parties involved.  I would love to get your stories and add them also, so please feel free to join in...  Happy reading...